What is Love?
This is the best I got. It is faulty, shallow, and full of holes, but it is where I'm at.
What is love? As the opening title and line popped into my head, I thought I might have another one bigger than a bread box destined for a longer piece. As I contemplated what I had already noted, and conversations in class and after, I realized I wasn’t qualified to write a longer dissertation on love. I don’t know if I ever will be. So, to that point, I’ll stick with the original plan of breaking out the four Greek words used for love in Scripture.
I paused briefly between the above paragraph and this. I wanted to set up a notes page in OneNote and start looking at scripture before moving on. It occurred to me that I usually have a piece of scripture I’m looking at and digging for deeper meaning into that by examining the Greek words behind the scripture. This time, I have Greek words we are digging into, and I’m looking for scripture containing them. I haven’t done that before.
I found a great site that has some very detailed notes on these four words for love, which I will list shortly. The site link is HERE. I know nothing about the site other than this one page, but I want you to see where I was reading before we move forward. Here are the four Greek words for love that came up in class.
Storge-Familial love as toward a parent or sibling
Phileo/Philia-Love of friends and brothers in arms
Eros-Romantic or erotic love
Agape-Charitable love for all people
I’m going to break each one down and give you my thoughts. I’ll also try to find a Greek definition either from scripture or out in the wilds of the Internet. Where I can, I’ll include scripture where the word is used. When I don’t have a use in the New Testament for the Greek (Storge and Eros), I’ll include scripture where the concept behind the word’s definition is covered. That last bit may get interesting because earthly humans have decided the concept is covered in the scripture, but the Divine Author did not inspire that word to be used. I’m not sure we’ll come to or find any definitive conclusions there, but we’ll see. Let’s cover Phileo/Philia first, then Eros and Storge, and finish up with Agape.
Phileo/Philia
36So the Jews were saying, “See how He loved him!”
John 11:36 (NASB95)
This is the passage where the brother of Martha and Mary died. Jesus knew him. The Greek word used here is the love of brother for brother, Phileo.
Greek Strong’s Number: 5368
Greek Word: φιλέω
Transliteration: phileō
Phonetic Pronunciation: fil-eh’-o
Root: from <G5384>
Cross Reference: TDNT - 9:114,1262
Part of Speech: v
Vine’s Words: Kiss, Love
Usage Notes:
English Words used in KJV:
love 22
kiss 3
[Total Count: 25]
From <G5384> (philos); to be a friend to (fond of [an individual or an object]), i.e. have affection for (denoting personal attachment, as a matter of sentiment or feeling; while <G25> (agapao) is wider, embracing especially the judgment and the deliberate assent of the will as a matter of principle, duty and propriety: the two thus stand related very much as <G2309> (thelo) and <G1014> (boulomai), or as <G2372> (thumos) and <G3563> (nous) respectively; the former being chiefly of the heart and the latter of the head); specially to kiss (as a mark of tenderness):- kiss, love.
James Strong, “Φιλέω,” in Strong’s Talking Greek and Hebrew Dictionary (WORDsearch, 2020).
This type of love is a love of equals. Brothers and sisters are equal as siblings in a family. Friends are not dominant or submissive but equal. Fathers and sons are considered equals in that the son would inherit from the father and was considered the father’s voice, advocate, or representative in all things, based on the structure of the time. The important concept of Phileo/Philia love to remember is that this is the love of equals.
20“For the Father loves the Son, and shows Him all things that He Himself is doing; and the Father will show Him greater works than these, so that you will marvel.
John 5:20 (NASB95)
Storge
Storge does not appear as a word in the New Testament Greek manuscripts. The word was in common use by the Greeks at the time, but it just doesn’t appear in any of the New Testament Greek manuscripts found to date. However, the Septuagint does use it twice. Before we move on, let’s explain what the Septuagint is.
The Septuagint is sometimes referred to as “The Seventy” or the “Greek Old Testament”. It is a translation of the Hebrew Bible from Hebrew into Greek. The word comes from a Latin word meaning “seventy” because there were seventy translators working to turn out the document. The Greek version was also translated into Latin and is commonly referred to as LXX, which is the Roman numeral for 70. It is important to note that the Septuagint is not canonical with what we consider the Holy Bible today. This text includes many books that the Jewish tradition does not consider canonical within their faith. As such, most protestant traditions exclude those books as well.
The point of all that is to explain how we get to the Greek language in a book written in Hebrew. The translations happened sometime in the 3rd or 2nd century BC, well before the time of Christ. It was done because most people couldn’t read Hebrew. This was the solution. Let’s look at a scripture.
31without understanding, untrustworthy, unloving, unmerciful;
Romans 1:31 (NASB95)
In King James, it uses “natural affection” in place of “unloving”.
31Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful:
Romans 1:31 (KJV 1900)
I’m not here today to dig into this scripture in context. Feel free to do that if you wish. Our goal is to look at the Greek behind the word in the New Testament. Here’s the Greek definition for the word above.
Greek Strong’s Number: 794
Greek Word: ἄστοργος
Transliteration: astorgos
Phonetic Pronunciation: as’-tor-gos
Root: from <G1> (as a negative particle) and a presumed derivative of stergo (to cherish affectionately)
Cross Reference:
Part of Speech: adj
Vine’s Words: Affection, Affected
Usage Notes:
English Words used in KJV:
without natural affection 2
[Total Count: 2]
From <G1> (a) (as a negative particle) and a presumed derivative of stergo (to cherish affectionately); hard-hearted towards kindred:- without natural affection.
James Strong, “Ἄστοργος,” in Strong’s Talking Greek and Hebrew Dictionary (WORDsearch, 2020).
You will note they list this one as using stergo as its root from which the negative word used is derived. The only other place storge appears is included as part of another form of love, brotherly love.
10Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor;
Romans 12:10 (NASB95)
Eros
This word also does not appear in the New Testament, but does appear in the Septuagint. Eros appears in two Proverbs. Let’s look at those now.
18“Come, let us drink our fill of love until morning; Let us delight ourselves with caresses.
Proverbs 7:18 (NASB95)
And the following:
16Sheol, and the barren womb, Earth that is never satisfied with water, And fire that never says, “Enough.”
Proverbs 30:16 (NASB95)
I find it fascinating that the website link above suggests an accurate, literal Greek translation of Proverbs 30:16 is "Hades, woman Eros, and Tartarus, and the earth will never be satisfied." The god of death, the love of a woman, Hell, and pouring water into the soil of the earth will never be satisfied." The website suggests just ignoring this literal reading and moving on. Further, the summation suggests Jesus wasn't teaching about this type of love. I would assume because it is instinctual and as a base instinct in the fundamental nature of the human being, we don't need to be told that our lust for physical lovemaking is never satisfied.
I also find it interesting that the only places this term is used are in a negative connotation. The first Proverb relates to the woman enticing the young man into adultery while her husband is away traveling. The second is in the connotation of a woman who is incapable of bearing children. I
The scripture quoted here is from Proverbs, which was written in Hebrew, not Greek. The Septuagint translation was made by, according to the historic record, six Hebrew translators from each of the twelve tribes of Israel. Sharp readers will note that’s 72, not 70. I can’t rectify that difference. We’ll just have to accept it and move on.
Agape
Finally, we come to the Greek word most people are familiar with, agape love. King James typically translates agape as “charity” or “charitable”. Modern interpretation of agape is in an unconditional format. I would like to suggest an augmented and somewhat nuanced meaning.
First, let’s look at this from a few perspectives. Agape love is the love of God toward His children. It is the type of love we are to strive to imitate, that is for certain. But what is it and how do we do it?
First, I do not subscribe to the “unconditional” nature of this love. I say that because God does not love all things. There are passages of scripture that specifically state God hates things.
16There are six things which the Lord hates, Yes, seven which are an abomination to Him:
17Haughty eyes, a lying tongue, And hands that shed innocent blood,
18A heart that devises wicked plans, Feet that run rapidly to evil,
19A false witness who utters lies, And one who spreads strife among brothers.
20My son, observe the commandment of your father And do not forsake the teaching of your mother;
21Bind them continually on your heart; Tie them around your neck.
Proverbs 6:16–21 (NASB95)
Does that mean God doesn’t want anything to do with those people who do those things? Not necessarily. God is not interested in taking in people who reject Him and knowingly do those things against Him. But He does want all people to turn to Him and His Son, Christ Jesus, willingly.
1This is now, beloved, the second letter I am writing to you in which I am stirring up your sincere mind by way of reminder,
2that you should remember the words spoken beforehand by the holy prophets and the commandment of the Lord and Savior spoken by your apostles.
3Know this first of all, that in the last days mockers will come with their mocking, following after their own lusts,
4and saying, “Where is the promise of His coming? For ever since the fathers fell asleep, all continues just as it was from the beginning of creation.”
5For when they maintain this, it escapes their notice that by the word of God the heavens existed long ago and the earth was formed out of water and by water,
6through which the world at that time was destroyed, being flooded with water.
7But by His word the present heavens and earth are being reserved for fire, kept for the day of judgment and destruction of ungodly men.
8But do not let this one fact escape your notice, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day.
9The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.
10But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, in which the heavens will pass away with a roar and the elements will be destroyed with intense heat, and the earth and its works will be burned up.
2 Peter 3:1–10 (NASB95)
How, then, does all this impact God’s agape love as an example for us? Let’s look at the Greek word for love as it pertains to how God loves and how we are to be imitators of His love. There are some interesting aspects within the Greek definition, I think will help us take a broad term and make it more easily applicable to daily actions.
To begin, the last word “love” in John 15:9 is agape. However, that word is specifically derived from the first word, “loved,” which is how God loved Jesus. We cannot and should not take the one without understanding the other. First, here is the scripture. Next, I’ll post the Greek word for the last “love” in that scripture, which is agape. Finally, I’ll post the Greek word used at the beginning of the scripture referring to God’s love for Jesus.
9“Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love.
John 15:9 (NASB95)
Here is the Greek word agape.
Greek Strong’s Number: 26
Greek Word: ἀγάπη
Transliteration: agapē
Phonetic Pronunciation: ag-ah’-pay
Root: from <G25>
Cross Reference: TDNT - 1:21,5
Part of Speech: n f
Vine’s Words: Feast, Love, Love feasts
Usage Notes:
English Words used in KJV:
love 86
charity 27
dear 1
charitably+ <G2596> 1
feast of charity 1
[Total Count: 116]
From <G25> (agapao); love, i.e. affection or benevolence; specially (plural) a love-feast:- (feast of) charity ([-ably]), dear, love.
James Strong, “Ἀγάπη,” in Strong’s Talking Greek and Hebrew Dictionary (WORDsearch, 2020).
Now, here is the Greek word agapao, upon which agape is derived.
Greek Strong’s Number: 25
Greek Word: ἀγαπάω
Transliteration: agapaō
Phonetic Pronunciation: ag-ap-ah’-o
Root: perhaps from agan (much) [or cf <H5689> ]
Cross Reference: TDNT - 1:21,5
Part of Speech: v
Vine’s Words: Beloved, Love
Usage Notes:
English Words used in KJV:
love 135
beloved 7
[Total Count: 142]
Perhaps from agan (much) [or compare <H5689> (`agab)]; to love (in a social or moral sense):- (be-) love (-ed). Compare <G5368> (phileo).
James Strong, “Ἀγαπάω,” in Strong’s Talking Greek and Hebrew Dictionary (WORDsearch, 2020).
The love of God toward Jesus, which is the love we are to emulate, is that in a “social and moral sense” but also, “much”. God has much love toward us, but not for the things we do that are not what He would consider socially or morally right.
A modern interpretation of agape love as being wholly unconditional, I think, is not accurate to how God loves us. I think He wants all people to turn to and love him, but I think He sees in us the potential for the good that we can become, and not in a sense of hope. God does not hope. God knows. To that point, God knows the totality of what we will become under His guidance, following His ways, and keeping His word. To that point, God has agape-love for us to become the most in Him that we can become.
We then translate the way God loves us in His knowing what we can become to our hope of what we see in others, what they might become. For us, agape love is loving all people around us because they can all become children of God. I see the difference as agape being a love for someone in whom you can see the potential, and therefore are willing to overlook the shortcomings, which appears to the receiver as "unconditional" but is merely the giver's hope in the potential. From God, it is not hope but foreknowledge of what the receiver is to become based on the interaction between the child and the Father. Philia isn't necessarily mutual because a brother or a sister might not return the love, but that doesn't stop it from being given in a familial way.
Summation
In summation, the physical love between a man and a woman as consecrated through the sacrament of marriage is wholesome and expected. It is the instinctive drive to fulfill the command to be fruitful and multiply, and in that context, it is not just good but valuable. All other physical love between God’s creatures is outside that definition.
The love of a brother and a sister is also not to the level of Divine love for mankind. Storge is also somewhat instinctive, as we have a greater bond between our siblings and parents. However, that bond can be broken through behavior by one or more family members towards other members of the family outside the bounds of what God approves of. Because familial love is fragile in this way, it also does not rise to the level of imitation of God’s love toward us.
Phileo/Philia is the most fragile of all the loves, I think. Friends are lost or gained far more easily than family members. Coming to or falling away from Jesus likewise takes an act that is typically out of the hands of human beings, though it does happen.
Agape love is that love that just is as the One who authored it just is. The great I AM loves in a way we can only hope to imitate. God wants us to see in our fellow Man the same level of potential He knows we will achieve, rather than the actions of today each of us perform. It is in seeing the potential to be another fruitful child of God that we truly discover the agape-love for the people that surround us, and we meet day to day. If we can try to envision the potential each person has, the hope of being better we want for ourselves is seen in those other people, too. In that, we begin to learn to love as God loves, and maybe grow a little closer to the source of that love, too. God bless and Godspeed.